Monday, 10 October 2011
Post-Picnic Feeding Friendsy
I'm still awaiting my cruel and unjustified deportation to the land of my ancestry, but I think it's going to take quite a long time for the process to grind into operation. So in the meantime - until that fateful day - it's business as usual; I'm continuing derive to bucketloads of comfort in the abnormally high moral and ethical standards of the present Tree/Liberationist Alliance Administration. Bless.
After those lovely cascades of verbal noises that trickled and tinkled from the chops of Dagwald Caedmeron, May Trees, Oswine and the other Tree Faction demiurges, this post-Picnic period is certainly anything but a picnic; the Redistributionists - those implacable enemies of reason and righteousness - have taken some unjustified side swipes at the Tree/Liberationist Administration, because of the recent escapades of Secretary of Defense, Leng the Fox. (I must point out that Leng the Fox does not share a common ancestry with my good friend Feaxede; the latter is a most admirable creature with a reddish coat and a bushy tail, while the former is - as far as I can discern - a human being. Or something approximating one..)
Anyway. Leng the Fox has a friend, and that's the problem. According to the sacred laws of the Redistributionists, it's a violation of Holy Law to have a friend - unless you're a Redistributionist of course, for whom all things are permissible and possible. And they're making a terrible fuss about the fact that this friend of Leng's travels with him everywhere on his Witangemot business, helping him to sell off the best Northumbrian swords, spears and longboats to the demented and power-hungry King Jose Borracho at a discount price. Leng the Fox's friend has helped him clinch many wonderful deals. And he's doubtless provided him with some welcome company in a lonely job. There are rumours of homeopathy swirling around, but the Redistributionists are consummate story-tellers - especially when the magic mushrooms are fresh and strong. Anyway, if they want to practise alternative medicine, that's their business; frankly, I don't give a dog's dollop.
I think it's terribly mean of the Redistributionists to make a great song and dance about Leng the Fox and his special friend; their former Great Leader and Holy Emperor Guffo the Brown had lots of friends to laugh and joke with while he was selling off all the remaining reserves of Northumbrian gold to the lowest bidder. So, what's the difference? If there's been any shady business going on in the Tree ranks, I'll bet my whiskers that they learned their tricks from the Redistributionists in the first place.
Still, at least this is an issue that Caedmeron can get his teeth into. After the Picnic, it might be useful for his to get his brain into gear; it hasn't been at all busy lately..