Tuesday, 22 April 2014
After a joyous Easter celebration here in the beautiful Kingdom of Northumbria with the Spring blossoms in full bloom and mood of cheerfulness in the air, the soothsayers have returned to their labours of love with sombre and sobering tidings for the people of the Realm.
It would appear that Dagwald the Moses - Aelric the Forger's Son's anointed and appointed successor to the throne of Madcaster Untied - has been deposed from his seat, and the reins of his reign are to be handed to another as yet unnamed pair of hands.
The entire Kingdom has consequently been in a state of stunned silence. Moses was the one in whom was invested all the hopes and aspirations of the people; his appointment (which has sadly turned out to be a disappointment) was designed to lead the people out of the bondage and ignominy of football obscurity and into the glory land of Championslig - a delectable land flowing with milk, mead and biscuit.
However, after a less than perfect beginning to his reign, the people have instead been led into a parched and endless terrain of rocks and sand, and it's been feared that this could herald a protracted period of wandering in the wilderness. As with his more widely-known Biblical and prophetic namesake, Moses has been forbidden to enter the Land of Promise; it's as yet to be told as to whether or not he was allowed a tantalising glimpse of the land from a distance.
However, as an antidote to the current mood of pessimism and gloom, Dagwald Caedmeron - the Holy Patriarch of the Tree/Liberationist Faction Administration - has called on the Kingdom of Northumbria to return to its Christian values. WIll the Redistributionists and the Vikings heed his clarion call? Will Madcaster Untied subsequently return to the days of glory?
The entire Kingdom is biting its fingernails, waiting for the answer. Your Cat doesn't really give a rat's rump...