Wednesday 10 October 2012

Caedmeron's Magic Words

Now that the Tree Faction's Annual Unfortunates' Outing and Picnic is in full swing, as with the previous events held by the other two factions, this Cat has tried his level best to ignore them, and to get on with his rodent-clearing responsibilities and, of course, the inevitable territorial maintenance. It's a tough life being a moggy..

Sadly though, it's been well nigh impossible to be completely impervious to the inane drippings of these frivolous politically-flavoured entertainments; this morning my vulpine friend Feaxede the Fox caught up with me while I was engaged in the matutinal tour of my empire, and excitedly told me that Dagwald Caedmeron - the King Cockroach of the Tree Faction and Tree/Liberationist Alliance Administration - had recently given his Most Important and Significant Speech since the last one. Hooray for Caddy Boy and the wayward wind! Excuse me. Better in than out...

Feaxede then told me that he'd heard from the soothsayers that the most significant words from the text of Caddy's oration had been assiduously collected and graciously offered to the window-licking hordes of the Northumbrian populace as an abstract object of veneration. Frankly, I don't hear many hushed and reverential tones among my Streonaeshalch parishioners, as they're too busy with more pedestrian matters, such as day-to-day survival. But never mind.

Among the key words and phrases of his speech were the following:

In This Together, Bunny Rabbits, Fairies, Kittens, Turnips, My Grandmother, Deficit, Taxation, Butterflies, Daisies, Sheep Droppings, Carrot Fly, Onion Rings, Bread And Circuses, Rhubarb and Biscuit.

The soothsayers are as I write manically attempting to extract some meaning from these coded utterances as if they'd proceeded from the lips of some Delphic oracle, or fly agaric-chewing shaman. I wish them well; they always did rely on active imaginations...

Back to the mice, methinks.

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